that time we worked for a clickbait site

Fresh off of the collapse of Testicles, our Grecco-Roman JRPG that we’d overdesigned and didn’t want to do any real work on, my brother and I were in dire need of funds. Real funds for serious business, which at the … Continue reading

The Legend of Sid Meyers’s

Welcome to the offices of Sid Meyers’s as they stand today. On the right, you can see the sales figures for our latest game, Joystick Madness. It is our first flight sim and potentially will go on to be the … Continue reading

originally posted in the depths of a Destructoid news item’s comment section

FRAGMENT FROM AN UNFINISHED PLAY Lit by a dim spotlight, Bill Gates raises his absurdly large revolver and empties all six chambers into the Xbox One. Behind him, 3 giant screens flash black and white, cycling through phrases like: FUCK … Continue reading

Bad Boys: Miami 2 – The Game

This is so perfectly from another era of cross-promotional movie-to-game cashgrab magic. Everything about this is just so totally not right, from the way the morality mechanics seem to work, to the voices, to the one-liners that are both terrible … Continue reading

woah, check me out!

update: Nightmare Mode went down, so I’ve reposted the essay here. Hey, I wrote an essay about Modern Warfare 2. You can read it here: It is titled: ahem CALL OF DUTY 6: MODERN WARFARE 2: ASS2ASS.GIF It is … Continue reading

GrindQuest 2012: The Faux Grind

Costume Quest (2010) Double Fine Productions Genre: Nostalgia via RPG Played on PC Not much new in gameworld. I’ve been playing Costume Quest and a bunch of Playstation 1 games to pass the time. Dunno if I’ll say much about … Continue reading

GrindQuest 2012

Sims 3 (2009) The Sims Studio Genre: Simulator/Grinder PC I was sitting in a car with Liz Ryerson and Andrew Handsome and they were talking about the death of jRPGs and how them games just don’t got it no more; … Continue reading

E.Y.E: Divine Cybermancy

E.Y.E: Divine Cybermancy (2011) Streum On Studio Genre: FPS/RPG PC Consider this an emergency broadcast: buy this game immediately. It costs $5 until January 2nd and is literally the best thing I have played in the past two years. Every … Continue reading

Fredward Bound, a novel in 25 parts

Dear friends, I don’t think I’ve mentioned this before, but I’ve been working with an associate on retranslating and annotating Twilight for the past two years. I’ll save you the tears and give you the smiles: it’s finished. It’s online. … Continue reading

Duke of Earl

DUKE NUKEM FOREVER (2011) 3D Realms/Triptych Games/Gearbox Software/Piranha Games Genre: FPS PC Like a movie that’s been media blitzed so hard that you wake up one day fully prepared to eat shit out of someone’s hand to see it, jazzed … Continue reading